I have a personality that feels a lot of guilt. My response to the grace of God drives me to want to help others, work in the church, respond to every phone call, etc. But as I read Richard Foster's book, Celebration of Discipline, I realized that I cannot meet every need. There are too many people who have “fell among thieves” for this Samaritan to handle. I am very deficient in the area of service and desire to do more, but I know my personality and my tendency toward extreme. So, how do I reasonably approach the discipline of service?
I need to remember that I'm not omnipresent. I cannot be everywhere at once. So, when I choose to serve because of my concern for others, I natural cut off other opportunities to serve. For example, I cannot fill my 4:30 - 6:00 time slot with two acts of service.
A "reasoned concern" for others recognizes this fact and measures my responsibility to others. I can and will say "no" to requests for service. When should this occur? That is, when two acts of service are competing for the same timeslot; how should I choose which to do?
First, I must be walking in the Spirit. I cannot enter into the disciplines without the Spirit of God or they will turn into pietistic actions that have no spiritual significance. In the past when I've developed a discipline I quickly begin to compare my self to others. This has created an unrealistic demand (or a law) that I explicitly or implicitly place on them. I begin to fill big in God - within a few hours, days, weeks I fall hard and cannot see anything for the dirt (this happens mostly in the discipline of study). So, Spirit lead service is essential.
Second, if my service for others begins to impact my family negatively I need to consider that it’s unreasonable. If my wife says, "you care more about **fill in the blank** than you do me and the children", then I need to consider that my acts of service are not reasonable. So, does my family feel safe and cared for? This is a reasonable question. (Now, on this point I’ve placed too much emphasis, at times, on my family and left the responsibility to serve on others (one of my guilt areas).
Third, this one is painful for me; do I gravitate to acts of service that are visible? Am I concerned about the "big deal" or can I serve in secret? Anyone who knows me knows that I'm visible. I'm not a demon in this area, but I recognize I’ve focused more on the visible. I’ve failed to balance my acts of service between the visible and the hidden; this needs to be resolved (the reason for my post – extraverted thinking requires it). So, I should gravitate to the hidden, invisible, yet relevant acts of service. (I say relevant because what I sometimes consider a hidden act of service in reality has no benefit to anyone).
Finally, I need to balance the cautions above. I can cloak my desire not to serve with so many "reasons" that I never do. It will not hurt my family to spend a couple Saturdays a month at the mission; to sit with a friend in need; or to visit the convalescent hospital on a week night. These are good and important. If I can, through the Spirit (from the heart) balance my service to others with a tendency toward the hidden acts of service than I have shown "reasoned concern" for others.
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7 comments:
Since you wrote this before a conversation my wife and I had this afternoon, I can't accuse you of listening in on it. We were discussing service/friendship/good works, comparing ourselves to others, and pretty much everything you wrote in your blog. Thank you for sharing your thoughts regarding these things.
I am understanding more and more why Jesus could sum up all the law in the two commandments he choose - 1) love the LORD God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, 2) our neighbor as ourself. Amazing what is bound up in those two items...
The more we discuss the topic of Christian liberty I realize Paul is only commenting on Matthew 22. Love God and love others.
I think God is helping us find his heart in the matter. Very exciting stuff.
Great thoughts Uncle Rob. I was thinking about some of these things recently too. I've wanted to do more for the Lord, but I don't know exactly what to do; I guess I need to find out what "my calling" is. But no matter what kind of work any of us do, there will be times when our work goes unnoticed. Mat.6:1-7
When something is on the Lords mind, it must be everywhere.
I used to think, the two commandments in Aarons comment were so easily fufilled when I first came to church, I can love everyone! As my walk starts to unfold, more and more comes out of my heart that I didnt know was there. Hurdles that make it hard to love.
I have heard (more times than I wish to have heard) that the Lord loves a just balance. But not in these 2 commands. These 2 commands are all or nothing with Him. But in our endeavor to love we have to be spirit led or we will burn out.
I am with everyone else that this is such an exciting time!! Thanks for your thought provoking blog.. Keep them coming!
Janie, you make a great point in regard to service, that is, what is “my calling”. We need to recognize our giftedness and operate in it. We'll feel more fulfilled and others will be more profoundly blessed.
Pray for God's direction and he'll give you insight into what you are to do. Take an inventory of your interests and talents and see if the combination doesn't give you some indication of how/where He wants you to work.
God bless,
Sarah, the "just balance" comment is most often used by people who don't want to serve others in meaningful ways (I know I've used it). It is over used. There is a statement made by Churchill that goes, "Never was so much owed by so many to so few". This the case in almost everything. It also pertains to service for others. I thought about it after Sis. Alzadah's funeral. She had so little, but see gave more than so many and lives were changed because of it.
Blessings
Thank You so much for your advice! You and me and Bonnie need to have breakfast again.
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